Welcome to Hell (2022)
Welcome to Hell is an Argentinian horror movie that came out in 2022 in the language of Spanish.
How I watched: Tubi
For the short of it: This movie is about a woman who becomes impregnated from a member of a satanic death metal band and she...doesn't vibe with that.
The long of it?
This whole movie, at least for a good chunk of this movie, is presented in a non-linear timeline. First off, the movie's first scene shows a bloodied pregnant young woman tied up to a cross whimpering and crying as a masked man is performing a satantic ritual with a blade in hand.
Aaaand insert the clip "Yeah, that's me. You're probably wondering how I got here*
Presented before us is the events leading up to that point with some random out of timeline sequences flashes in between. Easy to pick up on but not exactly my cup of tea.
So that young woman whom is heavily pregnant is Lucia. She currently lives with just her mute grandma in the middle of fucking nowhere. Like jungles and shit. Dirt roads and all. Wack I say.
So, if you really are wondering how she got to that point, we have to go all the way to beginning. Lucia and her friend were at a death metal concert just vibing when Lucia made the mistake to bat her pretty doe eyes to catch the attention of the lead singer. Oh, he noticed all right. He noticed her good.
I don't even know how the hell she was okay with this but she has been shaking it up in this decrepit shit hole which is where all the other band members reside. Long story short, despite their weird ass dynamic they got going on there, they end up sleeping together resulting in her pregnancy. And she's still living there this whole time like wut even! That's hella no place for a pregnant young woman.
Back to the present, Lucia looks like she is about to pop but she heads to the store to pick up some food. She rides her bicycle to and from and she is very clearly on edge for yet to be known reason. She doesn't really make a whole lot of chat to the cashier. She just wants to get her shit and leave. So she does.
It is pretty obvious at this point that she likes her seclusion and wants to keep it that way but flashing back to the metal band members, they are on the prowl for her! So it's basically like a cat and mouse game here where they want to track this girl down for obviously nefarious purposes and won't stop at anything until they do.
Premise of this movie is pretty tame to be honest. And one hell of a slow burner of a movie. I had to try at least twice to watch this movie and the only thing keeping me hanging on was the premise of metal inclusion. In which the same metal song was played throughout the movie. Not a bad thing but a lot of the similar clips at different points kept reintroducing itself through the plot points. That in itself carried the movie for me.
A lot of this movie centers around Lucia's mental anguish and anxieties. A lot of shots of her just staring into nothingness.
Other parts in the flashbacks is just focusing on how quickly their honeymoon phase faded. Like rapidly. Even the day that baby conceived had a very morbid tone to it. It went from a domestic abuse situation to horizontal mambo like THAT! Yeah, that's healthy.
The real action was towards the final 30-45 minutes when it finally catches up to the events that opened up the movie. Was it worth it? I honestly couldn't tell ya. It was an interesting movie with a very peculiar ending. A little silly but it was still entertaining in my eyes.
If you're looking for a movie filled with gore, this is not it. I can't even say for certainty this even counts as a horror movie. There was just so many movie minutes with no speaking lines. I could be wrong, maybe it is a horror movie but whatever. What do I know? Watch it or don't idc. If I were to come across this title again, I might even want to tune in again.
That being said, what is my verdict?
Slow burner but not boring
If you are interested in watching Welcome to Hell, then please CLICK HERE to see which streaming services you can view it on via the free streaming guide app, JUSTWATCH!
